The Fairest of the Seasons

Happy Fall! Harrisonburg is beautiful once again. The wind picks up my hair, and fulfills my mind and body with longing. The season and my heart align. Perfectly.

Different places

I am not where I am supposed to be.

And I mean that geographically. This town has never been right for me. I am a fish out of the ocean, a crayon in the wrong box.

How do you come to terms with something like this? Should I just bite the bullet and finish out my last two or so years here, or do I transfer to a golden city that is my destination? Practicality or happiness? Do I take the easy way out, or the way that would guarantee my freedom? And what would my family think? I've already spent enough money as it is. Or am I just in a really bad mood?

I have and have had a lot of issues with this town. I've never felt like I was at home here. It's the smell. The pathetic excuse for downtown life. The attitude. The people. The PEOPLE. It's as if I left my own hometown only to enter one exactly like it.

I have this awful tendency of cutting people out of my life once they betray my trust, no matter how minor the situation. It's okay, I can go to another person, friends are that disposable.

Sometimes, I really feel like I need regular therapy. This was pretty hateful.

Apathy, again

Everything I hate about you
is everything that is wrong with me.

HOT HOT HOT

I hate summer, and long for autumn. I need to smell the apple and pumpkin spices that make the Fall season so familiar.

My housemates and I will be going to the county fair next week.

I have been obsessing over outsider folk art, such as the artist Dwight Mackintosh. I read about him while I was supposedly working at the library the other day, absolutely brilliant and mindfully numbing work!

Also, it is really hard typing while drunk and sleepy.

Chai cupcakes with red raspberries on top. ♥

Buddy Holly's manbits

_MG_1245
Originally uploaded by jessicaroxanne atienza

I LOVE this picture. :D

Life Update

Grisha and I have been cat-sitting Clementine (the calico cat) for my friend Sarah Kelly for the past few weeks. Her landlord got pissed that she had a cat and gave Clementine the boot!

She and Link didn't get along at first; when she first arrived, Link decided to be territorial and sat on her carrier like a sphinx. That was the beginning of much hissing, brawling, groping, neck-biting, and violent-but-playful (?) nipping. Eventually they reconciled their differences and became good friends. Grisha and I loved having another cat around, and we both thought that Link and Clementine's cuddling was very sweet. But a few days ago Clementine was returned to Sarah after she moved into Camelot, and now Link is very lonely. :( He will of course see her again, since Sarah is my housemate.

***

Summer has been hot and lazy but all the more enjoyable. Simply working at the library, reading with Grisha, sewing, crocheting, making things and writing (or trying to at least). I have yet to finish a whole slew of songs.


I've been working on trying to make Grisha's apartment look nicer (and therefore more livable)... partly because I "sort of" live there. Essentially I will be splitting my life between Grisha's apartment and Camelot, where I still do not feel at home quite yet. I still have to paint the stencils on my wall as I don't know what else to do with them. I'm just going to copy the stencils that already existed on Kelly's wall and paint them onto mine, probably the same color too.

I am going to make almond butter this afternoon! It's a healthier alternative to peanut butter since it has less oils and fats, although I think it has more calories. But alas, it sounds yummy in my tummy!